MassageFreek

Start with Problems, Create Solutions

Saturday, March 24th, 2007 | Business Insights, Featured, Massage | No Comments

I get emotional. I get upset. I am human. I have the unique opportunity in the massage business to be rewarded more for emotional expression rather than emotional “calm and control.”

One of the many benefits of massage is emotional release. It, therefore, behooves me to be very honest and open about my emotions in my workplace because it will always help my client be more comfortable with “being themselves” and doing the emoting and releasing that I so desire for them to have.

Here’s a good amount of info on the subject of emotional release and it’s place in the massage world. › Continue reading

Business as Kink-friendly Business Owner

Saturday, March 24th, 2007 | Business Insights, Kink Friendly, Massage, Polyamory | 4 Comments

There are pros and cons to the business world. There are pros and cons to the kink and poly worlds. As an open person in general and doing business with this truth about me, I have noticed appreciation and lack of appreciation for my particular expression in the business world.

I find generous pats on the back at my business concept… “Way to go, Sierra, you are being open about your lifestyle and running a business that embraces and capitalizes off it; right on! You go girl!” Then I find there is also a darker side to the whole experience of kink-friendly business expression. This darker side, as I put it, is made manifest in a few different ways, some rather intangible. I have found that there’s a certain element of not being taken seriously, fear from others of the unknown and strange, and judgment that makes it’s self-known in subtle ways in society. but I could be wrong, to use an old and friendly line from Dennis Miller

While talking to Domonic - a great marketing guru of the Biznik crowd - at the last biznik happy hour, he informed me that one of his colleagues used my massage Freek business and concept to illustrate target marketing in a powerful way.

So, while I know that I am not the world’s greatest writer and certainly have many years yet in front of me, to perfect the art of expression myself as a powerful and valid business entity, I still have valid and even wise information to contribute.

So I find it making my little brain do twists n turns and sad that while my other esteemed sponsors of the bizjam have been written up in the Bizjam blog… massage freek’s top sponsor“15 minutes of fame” has yet to be mentioned in the Bizjam blog.

Hmmmm
I wonder what that’s about? What am I sponsoring? A button?
So I’ve given a call and wait for a response with the words of excitement spoken to me by Dan ringing in my head from Tuesday when he told me he was going to blog about me.

This is an example of “something that is happening” that makes an emotional and even, I’ll admit it, dubious and guarded and apprehensive person like me think “hah, I wonder if this whole massage Freek “being open” thing… is freaking them out? Or is it just that since I’ve gone from “scattered kinkster starting a business” to “icon of target marketing” . maybe what I WAS… is still the way they see me in their minds. ”
Who knows at this point?
I am just going to use this as an illustration of a “what the fuck?” that can happen … that make me wonder… is this due to being and openly sex-positive and kinky business owner? Or have they just forgotten? Have they not gotten enough information from me?

I’m in this for my own heart and passion. I am writing a post on this, not only to express my irritation but also to give some … examples

of the possible Hazards or cons of being open, honest and kinky in business. Chances are there are others that are open and doing business within the context of their chosen alternative lifestyles. I think, perhaps, I am getting a dose of realism with this experience. Not only do I have to face facts that I’m not super experienced at business, but there is also a stigma(?) attached to being kink-friendly.
I have also encountered this odd question of stigma or fear (?) at the inquiries regarding my monthly networking happy hour at the spitfire.

I was getting lots of notes and post with concerns like this: “if I go to this happy hour, will this make others think that I am kinky or in a kinky lifestyle?”
So ok, there are issues about being “outed” or being labeled as something they are not. Totally valid concerns. Chances are, if you are worried about that sort of thing… there’s something there to be healed. So my advice would be to say just go for it and to hell with the labels that might be posted on you. Honor yourself, if you know you’re not going to like the possible labels… just stay away. If you are open minded; and you want to check it out, just know that you will be triggered and, possibly, you will come up against your own issues. very scary. yup.

Honor your path.
It just purifies the party, so to speak.
Which is why Dominic preaches the word of target marketing … Market with people you actually want to work with.
Do I have a point?
Sure, it’s there somewhere. I think at this point, my wise and sage advice might be the best next thing to write…

People in the sex-positive and kink worlds are used to being treated with strange and even crass, but sadly, usually unconsciously demeaning behavior from those who are “vanilla,” uneducated, inexperienced or just plain judgmental of the lifestyler in question’s life. My communities are used to hiding, having double lives or being so far out there and bold that they just bust right thru and you can’t help but admire them. I wonder if I fit into any of those categories?

So there’s this presence of open-mindedness, inner clarifying and dogged self-examination (because everyone I know in any alt lifestyle goes thru YEARS processing self-doubt, questioning their motives because of the opinions of their loved ones and society at large and, of course, how others treat them) that I have found in most of the individuals that live and know themselves to be members of the kink, alternative, sub-culture and sex-positive natured communities. With this sort of confidence, matured from monstrous amounts of internal and externally enlightening experience, the kinkster, the poly guy and the Goth ‘n’ punk alike, have a tendency to see “normal” people’s unresolved personal image and sexual issues activated in their dealings with the general population.

yay, us.

So basically, I am boldly saying that “mah peepole” (and me) get treatment that just … heals and enlightens at same time that it pisses them the fuck off. It becomes a learned response because it is so common to get a funky response that demands a kinkster to be gaurded and not want to be hurt and vulnerable.

But what can we do? (get a massage with someone who understands :P) Use it! That’s what I say. Use that time and energy spent in self-examination thru the years as you were trying to decide whether or not you were fucked up for wanting to have more than one boyfriend (and wanting them to know about it and get along) or liking to get tied up, to educate, tolerate and eventually accept the divinity that we ALL are expressing.

Cool thing about people like me and the whack-o’s of sub-culture and the sex-positive communities, is that we’re pretty damn forgiving. Most of us, due to aforementioned intensive soul searching, we sorta understand that people can’t help but be a bit shallow, unexamined and well…. appearance driven. (I know I’m appearance driven… I hate the fear of looking bad and I can honestly say I’ve feared being associated with a person or group that could make me look bad)

So I forgive, thru gritted teeth, and understand that everything happens not only because it does, but also because it is supposed to. I believe, strongly, that we attract situations in our lives that challenge us to be bigger and make the world and ourselves grow.

In fact, I would even say it is my mission in life to challenge and be challenged so that I “get bigger” (i.e. produce more, get more unstuck and less irrationally and negatively “triggered”) and inspire others to “be bigger” in their own lives.

I have learned that I am a mirror for others. We all are. but oh! the things I see! or percieve to see. I know for sure that there are some people that intend no harm that know no better. I know for sure that there are some that truely have mean-spiritied intents. I practice honoring my feelings, learning from mistakes, watching out for my own judgements and moving into a place of more love and peace.

Sometimes it just takes me a few tries. and a good rant. If only I had the balls of dennis miller. oy.

What can you do?

Hang out with your cool friends that think it’s pretty badass that you can take 1.25 hours of single-tail action and give blessings and toasts to those souls that just don’t know the freedom they are missing. I think there’s a Zen practice in there somewhere.

So yeah, watch out for a post about massage Freek on the bizjam blog and my generous contribution to the conference in the next few days(?) weeks(?) whenever they get around to it.

SEO epic and getting better at blogging

Friday, March 23rd, 2007 | Business Insights | 1 Comment

I just recieved an email from a guy named Tom Schmitz. He wrote to me about how to get more sales and make my online presence gain me more business. His blog is at www.seocritique.com
The article he pointed me to just happens to be the one on the top of the list today. How’s that for being on top of things? so i looked thru the article and got some good ideas about things I could write about on this blog as well as taking a deeper look (for me at least) into that whole connection thing that happens when people refer to blogs, articles, material, thier own posts and … well yeah, that connecting to other blogs thing that I’m sure to master, sure of it, possitive… by the end of this year. ya hoo.

So yeah! Check out the article. It’s easy to read and informative and it will most likely entertain those who care about bloging and connection and SEO happiness and all that jazz.

NOte to my clients - I love you! Look out for articles on self care, client appreciation, what’s going on with yours truly and … well really fasinating community-oriented posts about the Kink, sex-possitive, Capital Hill and Seattle lifestyle. till then… suffer with my blog that is just starting… or go to my pal’s blog - Teri Ciacchi - who is a couselor for the crazy people who actually DO the life of Polyamory and Love and open relationships.

She’s a major baddass.

Have fun, kinky people. Get massage from me when life is hurtin’ ya and a good flogging just ain’t cutting it!

What to expect from the Massage Freek…

Tuesday, March 20th, 2007 | Business Insights, Featured, Massage, Seattle Events | No Comments

1. Randomness, coupled with a strong sense of personal integrity that commands me to keep my word and arrive early for most appointments.

2. Weird posts that actually teach something and give great and wise insight… that is, if you can decipher it.

3. Improved writing skills with time. For now, god help me.

› Continue reading

Awake in Business

Wednesday, February 21st, 2007 | Business Insights | No Comments

This week is totally packed and awesome!

On Monday, I enjoyed the company of other kink-friendly business owners at the Business Networking Happy Hour I host at the Spitfire Grill in Belltown.
Tuesday, I gave a lot of massage and had a day of learning that I still need to improve my biz skills. (I studied “getting things done” (a book) last night)
Today I’m having a great day of massaging and office/paperwork managing

Tomorrow I will be getting together with my Small biz consultant, Stacey Anderson, to dive in and organize this beast of a business I like to call massagefreek.
I also intend to do lots of errands; picking up the bulk wine for the social as well as the cheese and chocolate I want to have out for my guests.

And then Friday morning, I will be meeting Gwen Williams here at the office so we can redesign this place to be “wine-social friendly.” I am so excited!
A little nervous too, I must admit.

I wonder who will show up!

The details of the wine social:
When: Friday February 23rd
Time: 1:00pm to 10:00pm
Location: the massage freek office
216 Broadway Ave. E #202
Seattle, WA 98102

AND! If you want to schedule an appointment with me for a massage just call or email me:
206-465-6344
sierrafay@yahoo.com
Tell me what times work best for you. Yes, I do Saturdays and late-day appointments.

Business Homework

Tuesday, February 20th, 2007 | Business Insights | No Comments

One of the most talented polyamorous/kink relationship counselors I know is a gal named Teri Ciacchi. Her amazing skills at sex education and addressing the human conditions of personal romantic relationships has elevated her to international status. This woman is busy, radical and in demand.
She wants to get together with me and have some one-on-one business social time.

Today I got a call from her and afterwards, I realized that I still have a lot to learn about running a business. We have tried to make an appointment but it has not worked out. She finally told me today that I need to get back to her because she was seeing that I just wasn’t making it happen on my end.
Man, did I feel rotten. But it was a good reminder from a very powerful woman that I still need some big improvements in my business running skills.
I know that sometimes it can seem like someone is making no effort to change or get better, and truly - some people are not.

I have heard many horror stories about business owners that just didn’t run their businesses or their lives very well.

I know the power of words is great but there’s also a saying that goes “talk is cheep” “words are cheep - give me some action”
Well thank you Teri, I get it. I have made strides, and I pat myself on the back for those forward movements I’ve made in organization, scheduling and running my business but it’s obvious, from my results (aforementioned call) that I still need to improve.

I’ve hired a small business consultant, Stacey Anderson to help me organize my office and my tasks so that I don’t let important things like having tea with Teri fall thru the cracks. I moved my appointment with her up to this week just because I want to get better at this stuff NOW.

This is the path. This is life. These are my results… what do I think about them? What am I going to do about them? I am not going to beat myself up but I’m definitely going to give myself a good swift kick to the rear end to get in gear and stay on task. Asking for help is always a plus.
Thanks, Teri.